Echo Beach Tide Pools

Matchmaker

By Keith Alan Johnson
03-04-2000

Recently Juli and I had a group of friends by for a meeting of our writers group. The night went long. One of our friends chose to stay over night. While he was here he talked about his girl friend and how they met. At one point during the next morning his girlfriend actually called him up on his cell phone. He carries it around for that purpose.
Later that day, after he had left, Juli and I speculated on the possibility that he might be might be next one amongst our friends to get hitched.
Now? What's up with that? When people did that to me I got damn irritated. Whether I got married or not wasn't their business. I'd would rather they not speculate on my future. It certainly was awkward when someone would actually come out and ask to my face whether or not the girl I was dating was the one. When people would say they just want me to know the happiness they know, I would ask myself, do I not 'know' happiness?
Now I find myself on the other side of the coin. Why should I be comfortable with speculating on someone else's life? Am I somehow safe now that I'm married? Juli says it's our right to gossip with each other about our friends. After all, we are suppose to "be one" in marriage, so we can share our thoughts, right? We aren't gossiping to the world at large, so I guess it's all right.
Why should it be easier for me now? I got to thinking about how my relationship with my friends has changed over the years, especially now that I'm married. Some of them have gotten closer and others have gotten a little more distant. The ones who are couples are closer. The ones who aren't attached are the ones who have drifted away a little. I miss them.
Maybe I feel that if the friends that are drifting away were attached they would stop drifting away. If that's so then this whole Matchmaker thing is a selfish scam, right? Are we all so selfish that we would marry somebody off just so he would stay in touch?
Juli and I have been married for a little over 17 months. I'm a little more aware of my world around me now because I have to have an answer when she asks me "How was your day, sweetie?" It means I have to be more alert to what my day is. Or I could say "fine". We've all heard the conversation before...
"How was your day?"
"Fine."
"What did you do?"
"Nothing."
When I was single I didn't even have to do that. I had cats. It made the conversation a little easier.
"How was your day?"
"Meow."
"What did you do?"
"Meow."
No, now that I'm married the conversations are a little more significant. We gossip about our friends.

03-04-2000


<<<Previous Essay / Next Essay>>>